So... 24 hours after the email that revealed the religious bigotry of my family and their attempt to blackmail the format of my wedding ceremony? I'm completely devastated. Absolutely at a loss. I've never felt so alienated from my family in my life.
And for those who have known me for a few years - yeah, much bigger than with my father and our falling out four years ago.
I've ranged from complete numbness to absolute rage to having to excuse myself at work to go cry in private. And I'm just fed up. Right now, I don't want any of my relatives at my wedding. Frankly, I think they're out to spoil the day for me by making it about themselves. And I already get the sense that some bullshit will happen at the wedding that will leave me in tears - and not of joy.
I'm literally right on the edge of cancelling the wedding and running away with Erich to Vegas. Or, at this point saying fuck all to being nice and considerate of my family's feelings and going forward with a handfasting rather than the considerate-of-all-faiths secular wedding. Erich recommends we have one more talk with my mom.
I envy his hope. I truly do.
Erich's also at the edge with this - who, per an email this morning, is so emotionally exhausted due to the last two months dealing with his mother's death - that he's unable to really think coherantly about this.
What he did do this morning, however, was to mention something that in my rage I'd forgotten about. Driving up 95 through Providence toward the train station, he looked over at me and quietly said "By the way... happy anniversary."
May 31st. Six years.
Committment, honor, love, stability, respect, growth - these are the things we've developed in our six years. The good, strong foundations of a relationship. I don't understand how that's not enough for my relatives.
I truly don't.
I can't see how any joy can come from continuing this wedding planning.
I'm just...
.
31 May 2007
30 May 2007
On May 30, 2007...
I got to discover that I've been forced out of the broom closet with my pious Catholic family.
And how unaccepting they are toward me dictating how I will say my own wedding vows... which are already being done in a secular ceremony out of respect for their religion.
Whee.
Joy.
*pounds wall*
And how unaccepting they are toward me dictating how I will say my own wedding vows... which are already being done in a secular ceremony out of respect for their religion.
Whee.
Joy.
*pounds wall*
24 May 2007
Music wafting in the air...
To sum up, before I go into detail… I had an absolute blast last night. It was nearly everything I could have hoped for.
Wednesday evening was one of those blessed nights in Boston – the weather was absolutely perfect. Low 70s, no humidity, a light breeze. Picture-perfect late spring evening to stroll through the streets of Boston. Once Erich met me at Back Bay station, we walked through the park toward Symphony Hall, through my old neighborhood where The Beast apartment still stands quietly. I’d forgotten how much I loved that walk through the Southwest Corridor park, passing the doggies at play in the fenced-in dog playground, past all the kids playing in the playground and basketball courts along West Newton Street.
And I’d forgotten how beautiful St. Botolph Street truly is in the springtime – all of the tiny little gardens were in bloom. Everything was much greener and more lush than I remember it. The new brick sidewalks add a richer feel to the neighborhood. It looks older, more distinguished. I felt a brief sadness for leaving it behind, even if the life that I’m leading now makes me incredibly happy. I won’t lie – I do miss my old Boston neighborhood. Had I not met Erich, I imagine I’d probably still be living in that little studio apartment on Blackwood Street, cozily holed up in that single room flat and teeny tiny galley kitchen, but with a glorious bay window that I spent so many hours sitting in, watching the world go by. I’d still be comfortable there, living in the amazingly quiet spot only blocks from two of the busiest streets in the city.
But we didn’t stop by the old apartment – I just took a glance down the street as we walked by. We were on a mission for a quick dinner before hitting the theatre, and the closest place was Boston Market… mmmm… rotisserie chicken. Which was, of course, quite yummy and not at all concert-going elegant, but perfect for us.
(I should note…the photos are not mine from last night – we forgot our cameras. Erich took a couple of interior shots on his cell phone, though, so maybe they’ll be good enough to post later)
We arrived at Symphony Hall around 7 p.m., picked up our tickets at the box office, and headed inside. The first thing you notice about Symphony Hall is that it’s very different than the typical classical arts theater. Symphony Hall is rectangular – an actual hall. It reminds me of a royal court – with two tiers of narrow balconies wrapping around three sides, all focused upon the stage at the front.
The hall smells of history - that wonderful old smell of varnished wood, musty from years of patrons, and the slightly stronger smell of aged leather. The seats are the original from when the hall was built; hard wooden plank seats that pull down, not unlike the wooden planks in older high school auditoriums, but covered in a thin layer of leather and brass bolted to the frame. And, considering the era that the hall was built, they're surprisingly wide and comfortable for the modern American body. Perhaps it was to accommodate the heavy skirts of the Guilded Age... *grin*
There are literally NO bad seats in Symphony Hall - the entire building was designed with acoustics in mind, down to having only a few narrow rows in the balconies to prevent trapped sound. In fact, it's considered as one of the top concert halls in the world. And I'd forgotten how incredible the acoustics are, until I heard the definition of the oboe softly playing among the orchestra's strings. No instrument gets lost. Our seats were first balcony, center section (but a bit off to the left) - two rows in, back in a romantic little nook with narrow wooden steps to get to our seats.
And at 8, the lights dimmed and the fun began. John Williams took the stage, and my inner band geek was all asquee.
The opener was a piece called "Fanfare for a Festive Occasion" by Williams. It was my least favorite - mostly because it just sounded a bit discordant, honestly. But I'd never heard the piece before. *shrug* No matter. I knew what was coming up. :)
Boston Pops concerts follow a specific format - three music portions (each usually themed), wrapped around two fairly brief intermissions.
The first portion of the program was titled "A Tribute to Bernard Herrmann."
The set:
The Inquirer, from Citizen Kane
Scene d'amour, from Vertigo
Suite from Psycho
Prelude from North by Northwest
Suite from Psycho was, by far, my favorite of this set - the hall lights darkened, a movie screen was lowered, and the opening drive scene to the Bates Hotel - followed by the infamous shower scene - was played silent movie style as the orchestra played.
Very very cool. :)
The Prelude from North by Northest also was accompanied by a movie reel - a montage of Hitchcock movies, including The Man Who Knew Too Much, Vertigo, The Birds, and of course... North by Northwest.'
We then moved to the first intermission.
The second portion of the program was titled "From Broadway to Hollywood." And that's exactly what it was.
The Set:
Hooray for Hollywood (Whiting/Mercer, arr. Williams)
Carousel Waltz (Rogers)
Exerpts from Fiddler on the Roof (Bock/Harnick, arr. Williams)
All that Jazz, from Chicago (Kander/Ebb, arr. Williams)
Hooray for Hollywood immediately made me flash to Mel Brooks entering Caeser's Palace in History of the World Part 1, because it's the song from that very scene. :)
The waltz was lovely.
I found myself silently singing along with any of the words I knew from the various songs within the Fiddler on the Roof suite. Tamara Smirnova, the principle chair first violin, had a beautiful solo. Absolutely wonderful.
And All That Jazz is just one of those pieces that has to be a blast to play. Brass instruments having entirely too much fun with mutes. Slides all over the place. Seriously... it's Chicago, which is has a score that I drool over as a musician. I envied them.
And we went into the second intermission, where Erich and I popped out of the main hall for a quick drink and a breather. It was quite warm in the main hall by this time (no a/c, after all).
AND... then we got to the part of the evening that I absolutely reveled in.
Part Three: "At the Movies"
the set:
March from Superman (Williams)
Three Pieces from Harry Potter (Williams)
- Fawkes the Phoenix
- Nimbus 2000
- Harry's Wonderous World
A Tribute to George Lucas and Steven Spielberg (Williams)
- Opener to Jaws
- Star Wars Main Theme
- Raiders March from Raiders of the Lost Ark
- Main Theme, E.T.
Oh yes... *gleams*
The only, and I mean ONLY thing that could have made me even more happy with the Superman theme would be to hear the incredible opening fanfare titled "The Planet Krypton" which chills my spine any time I listen to it and the sound of the brass gets gloriously fuller and brighter. But yes... the main theme from Superman by itself is fantastic. A poor trumpet had a fudged note (and there were a few collective gasps of empathy in the crowd - trumpet players, perhaps?), but carried right on as if nothing happened.
I cuddled up to Erich's shoulder during the Harry Potter set, all cozy. :) For viewers not familiar with these pieces on their own... Fawkes the Phoenix is the piece from the end of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, where Fawkes pulls Harry, Ginny, and Professor Lockhart into the sky. Nimbus 2000 is a little woodwind piece that you hear off-and-on throughout the movie series. Harry's Wonderful World is the big sweeping piece that starts with the main theme, and just rolls through all of the discovery in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's (aka Sorcerer's) Stone.
And then the movie screen lowered again... and we saw a familiar solitary female swimmer in the ocean, viewed from under the water as she kicked lazily.
And we heard a "dun-DUN"
And there were chuckles from all over the hall.
Now...
It really only takes two notes to recognize the theme from Jaws, doesn't it? I think that's what's so remarkable about Williams' music. Yes, I realize he steals bits and pieces from everywhere. Yes, I realize there are a ton of critics out there.
But seriously - there's something to be said for themes that are so incredibly recognizable with only the first few notes... Jaws, Star Wars, the end scene from Close Encounters of the Third Kind, E.T., the opening theme from Home Alone... and yes... Harry Potter. Take a look at the list. :)
The montage of Lucas/Spielberg movie magic continued into Star Wars, which of course received tremendous cheers as clips of all six movies flashed across the screen. Followed by Raiders, and a montage of all three movies. Lots of chuckles as the "gun scenes" with Indy and the local villagers flashed in sequence. And then the music soared with the main theme to E.T., with clips of a now waaaaay too young Drew Barrymore screaming as she meets the little alien.
Ah yes, it was glorious. The only piece that would have made the montage truly complete for me would have been to see a gigantic spaceship rise up over Devil's Monument with the big five note motif that runs through Close Encounters of the Third Kind, one of the first movies I ever saw (Star Wars, in the theater at age two - which I do in fact remember with only one scene in flashback - was the first).
Of course, standing ovation across the house. And Williams milked it - as well he should.
He came back out for encores:
Luke and Leia Theme from Empire Strikes Back (Williams)
NBC Nightly News "Mission" theme (Williams)
Williams made a joke about the "love" theme that is Luke and Leia - written before the world knew they were siblings (whoops). He also remarked that he's waiting for the "slow news day" when NBC News actually plays the entire theme he wrote for them (you can hear a good portion of it in the end credits for the program).
And then, as is traditional with the Boston Pops - the evening ended with Souza's Stars and Stripes Forever as the audience clapped along. And for a while, Williams had to conduct the audience to keep proper time. :) The American flag unfurled at the end (also tradition) to the roar of the crowd. And once the applause had died off, we returned to the glorious springtime evening weather and headed home.
Life accomplishment checked off my list - in amazing style.
Wednesday evening was one of those blessed nights in Boston – the weather was absolutely perfect. Low 70s, no humidity, a light breeze. Picture-perfect late spring evening to stroll through the streets of Boston. Once Erich met me at Back Bay station, we walked through the park toward Symphony Hall, through my old neighborhood where The Beast apartment still stands quietly. I’d forgotten how much I loved that walk through the Southwest Corridor park, passing the doggies at play in the fenced-in dog playground, past all the kids playing in the playground and basketball courts along West Newton Street.
And I’d forgotten how beautiful St. Botolph Street truly is in the springtime – all of the tiny little gardens were in bloom. Everything was much greener and more lush than I remember it. The new brick sidewalks add a richer feel to the neighborhood. It looks older, more distinguished. I felt a brief sadness for leaving it behind, even if the life that I’m leading now makes me incredibly happy. I won’t lie – I do miss my old Boston neighborhood. Had I not met Erich, I imagine I’d probably still be living in that little studio apartment on Blackwood Street, cozily holed up in that single room flat and teeny tiny galley kitchen, but with a glorious bay window that I spent so many hours sitting in, watching the world go by. I’d still be comfortable there, living in the amazingly quiet spot only blocks from two of the busiest streets in the city.
But we didn’t stop by the old apartment – I just took a glance down the street as we walked by. We were on a mission for a quick dinner before hitting the theatre, and the closest place was Boston Market… mmmm… rotisserie chicken. Which was, of course, quite yummy and not at all concert-going elegant, but perfect for us.
(I should note…the photos are not mine from last night – we forgot our cameras. Erich took a couple of interior shots on his cell phone, though, so maybe they’ll be good enough to post later)
We arrived at Symphony Hall around 7 p.m., picked up our tickets at the box office, and headed inside. The first thing you notice about Symphony Hall is that it’s very different than the typical classical arts theater. Symphony Hall is rectangular – an actual hall. It reminds me of a royal court – with two tiers of narrow balconies wrapping around three sides, all focused upon the stage at the front.
The hall smells of history - that wonderful old smell of varnished wood, musty from years of patrons, and the slightly stronger smell of aged leather. The seats are the original from when the hall was built; hard wooden plank seats that pull down, not unlike the wooden planks in older high school auditoriums, but covered in a thin layer of leather and brass bolted to the frame. And, considering the era that the hall was built, they're surprisingly wide and comfortable for the modern American body. Perhaps it was to accommodate the heavy skirts of the Guilded Age... *grin*
There are literally NO bad seats in Symphony Hall - the entire building was designed with acoustics in mind, down to having only a few narrow rows in the balconies to prevent trapped sound. In fact, it's considered as one of the top concert halls in the world. And I'd forgotten how incredible the acoustics are, until I heard the definition of the oboe softly playing among the orchestra's strings. No instrument gets lost. Our seats were first balcony, center section (but a bit off to the left) - two rows in, back in a romantic little nook with narrow wooden steps to get to our seats.
And at 8, the lights dimmed and the fun began. John Williams took the stage, and my inner band geek was all asquee.
The opener was a piece called "Fanfare for a Festive Occasion" by Williams. It was my least favorite - mostly because it just sounded a bit discordant, honestly. But I'd never heard the piece before. *shrug* No matter. I knew what was coming up. :)
Boston Pops concerts follow a specific format - three music portions (each usually themed), wrapped around two fairly brief intermissions.
The first portion of the program was titled "A Tribute to Bernard Herrmann."
The set:
The Inquirer, from Citizen Kane
Scene d'amour, from Vertigo
Suite from Psycho
Prelude from North by Northwest
Suite from Psycho was, by far, my favorite of this set - the hall lights darkened, a movie screen was lowered, and the opening drive scene to the Bates Hotel - followed by the infamous shower scene - was played silent movie style as the orchestra played.
Very very cool. :)
The Prelude from North by Northest also was accompanied by a movie reel - a montage of Hitchcock movies, including The Man Who Knew Too Much, Vertigo, The Birds, and of course... North by Northwest.'
We then moved to the first intermission.
The second portion of the program was titled "From Broadway to Hollywood." And that's exactly what it was.
The Set:
Hooray for Hollywood (Whiting/Mercer, arr. Williams)
Carousel Waltz (Rogers)
Exerpts from Fiddler on the Roof (Bock/Harnick, arr. Williams)
All that Jazz, from Chicago (Kander/Ebb, arr. Williams)
Hooray for Hollywood immediately made me flash to Mel Brooks entering Caeser's Palace in History of the World Part 1, because it's the song from that very scene. :)
The waltz was lovely.
I found myself silently singing along with any of the words I knew from the various songs within the Fiddler on the Roof suite. Tamara Smirnova, the principle chair first violin, had a beautiful solo. Absolutely wonderful.
And All That Jazz is just one of those pieces that has to be a blast to play. Brass instruments having entirely too much fun with mutes. Slides all over the place. Seriously... it's Chicago, which is has a score that I drool over as a musician. I envied them.
And we went into the second intermission, where Erich and I popped out of the main hall for a quick drink and a breather. It was quite warm in the main hall by this time (no a/c, after all).
AND... then we got to the part of the evening that I absolutely reveled in.
Part Three: "At the Movies"
the set:
March from Superman (Williams)
Three Pieces from Harry Potter (Williams)
- Fawkes the Phoenix
- Nimbus 2000
- Harry's Wonderous World
A Tribute to George Lucas and Steven Spielberg (Williams)
- Opener to Jaws
- Star Wars Main Theme
- Raiders March from Raiders of the Lost Ark
- Main Theme, E.T.
Oh yes... *gleams*
The only, and I mean ONLY thing that could have made me even more happy with the Superman theme would be to hear the incredible opening fanfare titled "The Planet Krypton" which chills my spine any time I listen to it and the sound of the brass gets gloriously fuller and brighter. But yes... the main theme from Superman by itself is fantastic. A poor trumpet had a fudged note (and there were a few collective gasps of empathy in the crowd - trumpet players, perhaps?), but carried right on as if nothing happened.
I cuddled up to Erich's shoulder during the Harry Potter set, all cozy. :) For viewers not familiar with these pieces on their own... Fawkes the Phoenix is the piece from the end of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, where Fawkes pulls Harry, Ginny, and Professor Lockhart into the sky. Nimbus 2000 is a little woodwind piece that you hear off-and-on throughout the movie series. Harry's Wonderful World is the big sweeping piece that starts with the main theme, and just rolls through all of the discovery in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's (aka Sorcerer's) Stone.
And then the movie screen lowered again... and we saw a familiar solitary female swimmer in the ocean, viewed from under the water as she kicked lazily.
And we heard a "dun-DUN"
And there were chuckles from all over the hall.
Now...
It really only takes two notes to recognize the theme from Jaws, doesn't it? I think that's what's so remarkable about Williams' music. Yes, I realize he steals bits and pieces from everywhere. Yes, I realize there are a ton of critics out there.
But seriously - there's something to be said for themes that are so incredibly recognizable with only the first few notes... Jaws, Star Wars, the end scene from Close Encounters of the Third Kind, E.T., the opening theme from Home Alone... and yes... Harry Potter. Take a look at the list. :)
The montage of Lucas/Spielberg movie magic continued into Star Wars, which of course received tremendous cheers as clips of all six movies flashed across the screen. Followed by Raiders, and a montage of all three movies. Lots of chuckles as the "gun scenes" with Indy and the local villagers flashed in sequence. And then the music soared with the main theme to E.T., with clips of a now waaaaay too young Drew Barrymore screaming as she meets the little alien.
Ah yes, it was glorious. The only piece that would have made the montage truly complete for me would have been to see a gigantic spaceship rise up over Devil's Monument with the big five note motif that runs through Close Encounters of the Third Kind, one of the first movies I ever saw (Star Wars, in the theater at age two - which I do in fact remember with only one scene in flashback - was the first).
Of course, standing ovation across the house. And Williams milked it - as well he should.
He came back out for encores:
Luke and Leia Theme from Empire Strikes Back (Williams)
NBC Nightly News "Mission" theme (Williams)
Williams made a joke about the "love" theme that is Luke and Leia - written before the world knew they were siblings (whoops). He also remarked that he's waiting for the "slow news day" when NBC News actually plays the entire theme he wrote for them (you can hear a good portion of it in the end credits for the program).
And then, as is traditional with the Boston Pops - the evening ended with Souza's Stars and Stripes Forever as the audience clapped along. And for a while, Williams had to conduct the audience to keep proper time. :) The American flag unfurled at the end (also tradition) to the roar of the crowd. And once the applause had died off, we returned to the glorious springtime evening weather and headed home.
Life accomplishment checked off my list - in amazing style.
22 May 2007
My inner band geek is going insane
This requires a story. Which makes for the best blog entries, right?
O-kay.
So, I'm chugging over to the train station after work today, running a bit later than I normally do, but I still have a comfortable 15 minutes to make the 4 block walk. My iPod is cranking, and I clear the walk in just over 5 minutes - about what I normally do.
What I *don't* normally do is grab a copy of the Metro. It's a little too McPaper for me normally. But I was in the mood for a Sudoku on the way home. It's free. And the hawker was being ignored, so I decided to give him a bit of love and take one.
Get in the station - the train's already boarding. So I head on out, walk the entire length of the train to the first car (where I'm guaranteed to get a single seat for my hour ride home), plunk down, and open the paper.
I skim the paper before the train leaves, and come to the page of entertainment listings for the Boston metro area. And I see a picture. And realize - it is, in fact, that time of year... and maybe if I'm really, really lucky... this year will be my year. And I make a mental note to talk to Erich when I get home.
Which I do immediately upon entering the car at the Providence train station. And Erich likes the idea. And says "sure... it'll be our sixth anniversary outing."
Six years. ;) Shocking.
But yeah... I still feel lucky.
So we go home. And I go upstairs, credit card in hand.
Try for our original plan - Thursday night. No dice. No tickets available for two people. Friday? Nope. Now I have to double-check with Erich, as Wednesday is a sacred gaming night between he and the guys. Erich says yes, since there's no other choice - and it is a rather special occasion.
I luck out. Two tickets. First balcony center at Symphony Hall. $100 for the pair, night before show. Perfect. Click, buy - YAY!
To see John Williams conduct the Boston Pops.
Now - I've dreamed of attending a Pops concert when John Williams was conducting since I moved to Boston in 1993. He usually only conducts a handful of concerts around Memorial Day. Some years (*cough* Star Wars) he hasn't conducted due to his composing schedule. I played Williams' music in high school band - we played the Overture to The Cowboys, a piece that's a bit lost to the annals of film, perhaps. But I love the piece.
And of course, I'm a geek. I'm a band geek. And he composed Star Wars. And Jaws. And Raiders of the Lost Ark. And Harry Potter. And well... a crapload of other stuff.
And by complete, sheer luck - THAT is what he's conducting tomorrow night. His own compositions, including several from the new Harry Potter movie coming out this summer.
I. Cannot. Wait.
And one of the big things that I had on my personal "Must Do In My Lifetime" checklist can now be crossed off.
*bounce*
O-kay.
So, I'm chugging over to the train station after work today, running a bit later than I normally do, but I still have a comfortable 15 minutes to make the 4 block walk. My iPod is cranking, and I clear the walk in just over 5 minutes - about what I normally do.
What I *don't* normally do is grab a copy of the Metro. It's a little too McPaper for me normally. But I was in the mood for a Sudoku on the way home. It's free. And the hawker was being ignored, so I decided to give him a bit of love and take one.
Get in the station - the train's already boarding. So I head on out, walk the entire length of the train to the first car (where I'm guaranteed to get a single seat for my hour ride home), plunk down, and open the paper.
I skim the paper before the train leaves, and come to the page of entertainment listings for the Boston metro area. And I see a picture. And realize - it is, in fact, that time of year... and maybe if I'm really, really lucky... this year will be my year. And I make a mental note to talk to Erich when I get home.
Which I do immediately upon entering the car at the Providence train station. And Erich likes the idea. And says "sure... it'll be our sixth anniversary outing."
Six years. ;) Shocking.
But yeah... I still feel lucky.
So we go home. And I go upstairs, credit card in hand.
Try for our original plan - Thursday night. No dice. No tickets available for two people. Friday? Nope. Now I have to double-check with Erich, as Wednesday is a sacred gaming night between he and the guys. Erich says yes, since there's no other choice - and it is a rather special occasion.
I luck out. Two tickets. First balcony center at Symphony Hall. $100 for the pair, night before show. Perfect. Click, buy - YAY!
To see John Williams conduct the Boston Pops.
Now - I've dreamed of attending a Pops concert when John Williams was conducting since I moved to Boston in 1993. He usually only conducts a handful of concerts around Memorial Day. Some years (*cough* Star Wars) he hasn't conducted due to his composing schedule. I played Williams' music in high school band - we played the Overture to The Cowboys, a piece that's a bit lost to the annals of film, perhaps. But I love the piece.
And of course, I'm a geek. I'm a band geek. And he composed Star Wars. And Jaws. And Raiders of the Lost Ark. And Harry Potter. And well... a crapload of other stuff.
And by complete, sheer luck - THAT is what he's conducting tomorrow night. His own compositions, including several from the new Harry Potter movie coming out this summer.
I. Cannot. Wait.
And one of the big things that I had on my personal "Must Do In My Lifetime" checklist can now be crossed off.
*bounce*
My mentality for the day...
Gets summed up here:
Tonight's plan:
- Pet cats (all... six of them)
- Stitch
- Watch Deadliest Catch
- Watch something with Tennant (above) in it. Hell, maybe I'll watch Gridlock (from which episodes behind-the-scenes pics this photo came).
*sigh*
Tonight's plan:
- Pet cats (all... six of them)
- Stitch
- Watch Deadliest Catch
- Watch something with Tennant (above) in it. Hell, maybe I'll watch Gridlock (from which episodes behind-the-scenes pics this photo came).
*sigh*
21 May 2007
Our new Hemingway Cat
Meet Hoodsie - the newest addition to the insane cat posse.
There are three other photos of him at my Flickr site. He wasn't too thrilled with my interruption of his evening nap with the camera.
But I did want to get first pictures of what he looks like - we're adding yet another cat fur color to the menagerie - and also to show off the amazing feet that just fascinate me every time I look at him.
See - with the exception of Elly, who has little back dew claws that make her a very rare form of polydactyl cat (usually the back paws are only affected if the front paws are), I've never had a multi-toed cat. Even Elly's extra toes aren't really visible unless you look closely - her dew claws are tiny. They're full toes - complete with a paw pad and all, but they don't touch the ground, and they're so small that they blend in with the rest of her fur.
And then Hoodsie comes along, who is insanely polydactyl. The boy has lots and lots of toes. Two extra on every foot. Three extra on one back foot. True Hemingway Cat here (and I absolutely adore that term... very literary and distinguished).
In any case, he's doing fine. He was extremely vocal tonight about being in the sunroom (he's tired of it and wants to explore), but we took turns petting him. He was very appreciative of his evening can of food, and now seems to have settled down for another nap.
All is well. And we're still crazy. But yeah, I know we did the right thing.
ETA: Kim pointed out that I hadn't exactly mentioned how we named Hoodsie. (I forget this... because we've explained it in person to so many people)...
Hoodsie is named because he comes from the neighborhood (aka 'hood), and the name just kinda stuck. He also is a chunky cat, suggesting that he's eating too many Hoodsie Pops and Hoodsie Cups. (Hood is a local dairy brand here in New England, and "Hoodsie" is the common name for any ice cream cups served with a wooden stick).
What's wrong with women?
Found via the rabbit hole of blog links today... and while I don't agree with everything, it's definitely an interesting, thought-provoking read.
- Let's Watch A Girl Get Beaten To Death.
via Whedonesque
This is not my blog, but I don’t have a blog, or a space, and I’d like to be heard for a bit.
Last month seventeen year old Dua Khalil was pulled into a crowd of young men, some of them (the instigators) family, who then kicked and stoned her to death. This is an example of the breath-taking oxymoron “honor killing”, in which a family member (almost always female) is murdered for some religious or ethical transgression. Dua Khalil, who was of the Yazidi faith, had been seen in the company of a Sunni Muslim, and possibly suspected of having married him or converted. That she was torturously murdered for this is not, in fact, a particularly uncommon story. But now you can watch the action up close on CNN. Because as the girl was on the ground trying to get up, her face nothing but red, the few in the group of more than twenty men who were not busy kicking her and hurling stones at her were filming the event with their camera-phones.
There were security officers standing outside the area doing nothing, but the footage of the murder was taken – by more than one phone – from the front row. Which means whoever shot it did so not to record the horror of the event, but to commemorate it. To share it. Because it was cool.
I could start a rant about the level to which we have become desensitized to violence, about the evils of the voyeuristic digital world in which everything is shown and everything is game, but honestly, it’s been said. And I certainly have no jingoistic cultural agenda. I like to think that in America this would be considered unbearably appalling, that Kitty Genovese is still remembered, that we are more evolved. But coincidentally, right before I stumbled on this vid I watched the trailer for “Captivity”.
A few of you may know that I took public exception to the billboard campaign for this film, which showed a concise narrative of the kidnapping, torture and murder of a sexy young woman. I wanted to see if the film was perhaps more substantial (especially given the fact that it was directed by “The Killing Fields” Roland Joffe) than the exploitive ad campaign had painted it. The trailer resembles nothing so much as the CNN story on Dua Khalil. Pretty much all you learn is that Elisha Cuthbert is beautiful, then kidnapped, inventively, repeatedly and horrifically tortured, and that the first thing she screams is “I’m sorry”.
“I’m sorry.”
What is wrong with women?
I mean wrong. Physically. Spiritually. Something unnatural, something destructive, something that needs to be corrected.
How did more than half the people in the world come out incorrectly? I have spent a good part of my life trying to do that math, and I’m no closer to a viable equation. And I have yet to find a culture that doesn’t buy into it. Women’s inferiority – in fact, their malevolence -- is as ingrained in American popular culture as it is anywhere they’re sporting burkhas. I find it in movies, I hear it in the jokes of colleagues, I see it plastered on billboards, and not just the ones for horror movies. Women are weak. Women are manipulative. Women are somehow morally unfinished. (Objectification: another tangential rant avoided.) And the logical extension of this line of thinking is that women are, at the very least, expendable.
I try to think how we got here. The theory I developed in college (shared by many I’m sure) is one I have yet to beat: Womb Envy. Biology: women are generally smaller and weaker than men. But they’re also much tougher. Put simply, men are strong enough to overpower a woman and propagate. Women are tough enough to have and nurture children, with or without the aid of a man. Oh, and they’ve also got the equipment to do that, to be part of the life cycle, to create and bond in a way no man ever really will. Somewhere a long time ago a bunch of men got together and said, “If all we do is hunt and gather, let’s make hunting and gathering the awesomest achievement, and let’s make childbirth kinda weak and shameful.” It’s a rather silly simplification, but I believe on a mass, unconscious level, it’s entirely true. How else to explain the fact that cultures who would die to eradicate each other have always agreed on one issue? That every popular religion puts restrictions on women’s behavior that are practically untenable? That the act of being a free, attractive, self-assertive woman is punishable by torture and death? In the case of this upcoming torture-porn, fictional. In the case of Dua Khalil, mundanely, unthinkably real. And both available for your viewing pleasure.
It’s safe to say that I’ve snapped. That something broke, like one of those robots you can conquer with a logical conundrum. All my life I’ve looked at this faulty equation, trying to understand, and I’ve shorted out. I don’t pretend to be a great guy; I know really really well about objectification, trust me. And I’m not for a second going down the “women are saints” route – that just leads to more stone-throwing (and occasional Joan-burning). I just think there is the staggering imbalance in the world that we all just take for granted. If we were all told the sky was evil, or at best a little embarrassing, and we ought not look at it, wouldn’t that tradition eventually fall apart? (I was going to use ‘trees’ as my example, but at the rate we’re getting rid of them I’m pretty sure we really do think they’re evil. See how all rants become one?)
Now those of you who frequent this site are, in my wildly biased opinion, fairly evolved. You may hear nothing new here. You may be way ahead of me. But I can’t contain my despair, for Dua Khalil, for humanity, for the world we’re shaping. Those of you who have followed the link I set up know that it doesn’t bring you to a video of a murder. It brings you to a place of sanity, of people who have never stopped asking the question of what is wrong with this world and have set about trying to change the answer. Because it’s no longer enough to be a decent person. It’s no longer enough to shake our heads and make concerned grimaces at the news. True enlightened activism is the only thing that can save humanity from itself. I’ve always had a bent towards apocalyptic fiction, and I’m beginning to understand why. I look and I see the earth in flames. Her face was nothing but red.
All I ask is this: Do something. Try something. Speaking out, showing up, writing a letter, a check, a strongly worded e-mail. Pick a cause – there are few unworthy ones. And nudge yourself past the brink of tacit support to action. Once a month, once a year, or just once. If you can’t think of what to do, there is this handy link. Even just learning enough about a subject so you can speak against an opponent eloquently makes you an unusual personage. Start with that. Any one of you would have cried out, would have intervened, had you been in that crowd in Bashiqa. Well thanks to digital technology, you’re all in it now.
I have never had any faith in humanity. But I will give us props on this: if we can evolve, invent and theorize our way into the technologically magical, culturally diverse and artistically magnificent race we are and still get people to buy the idiotic idea that half of us are inferior, we’re pretty amazing. Let our next sleight of hand be to make that myth disappear.
The sky isn’t evil. Try looking up.
- Joss Whedon
20 May 2007
Erich and I really need to stop this...
For the folks who are in the know - Hoodsie is now in our sunroom with a temporary cat quarantine setup (bowls, litterbox, bed, etc.)
After finding one of the neighborhood cats hit and dumped on the road this week, we finally caved in. I mean... we've been feeding him for what? Four months now? Plus we've named him.
It really was a matter of time.
Took him to the vet this morning (we love our vet that's open 7 days a week). Feline leukemia and FIV negative. He has fleas, oddly no ear mites, but a myriad of scratch scabs all over him from fights and who knows what else. He needs a serious bath. But otherwise, he's healthy - no respiratory issues. Heart sounds fine. No apparent issues to the touch with his innards. They gave him the first round of rabies and distemper vaccines. Because he's an adult, they think they might be able to give him the boosters sooner than the usual waiting period.
Neutering appointment is Friday.
We'll be keeping him in the sunroom quarantined for probably about a month - mostly to control fleas. (although all of the cats will go on meds for about 6 months once he's released into general house population). The room has been cleared of couches and anything we can't physically wash. We continue to celebrate the fact that we have hardwood floors. :)
*sigh*
We're insane. Completely, utterly insane.
After finding one of the neighborhood cats hit and dumped on the road this week, we finally caved in. I mean... we've been feeding him for what? Four months now? Plus we've named him.
It really was a matter of time.
Took him to the vet this morning (we love our vet that's open 7 days a week). Feline leukemia and FIV negative. He has fleas, oddly no ear mites, but a myriad of scratch scabs all over him from fights and who knows what else. He needs a serious bath. But otherwise, he's healthy - no respiratory issues. Heart sounds fine. No apparent issues to the touch with his innards. They gave him the first round of rabies and distemper vaccines. Because he's an adult, they think they might be able to give him the boosters sooner than the usual waiting period.
Neutering appointment is Friday.
We'll be keeping him in the sunroom quarantined for probably about a month - mostly to control fleas. (although all of the cats will go on meds for about 6 months once he's released into general house population). The room has been cleared of couches and anything we can't physically wash. We continue to celebrate the fact that we have hardwood floors. :)
*sigh*
We're insane. Completely, utterly insane.
18 May 2007
Weekend Plans
Our plans to go to the drive-in were quickly squashed by the current weather. While I wouldn't mind going to see a movie under warm, rainy skies, I don't care to go and freeze my ass off in low 40's damp. Bleh. So change of plans - we'll go to see a movie in Boston tonight along with some friends. The plan is to go see Shrek 3, which was the original drive-in plan, too.
Hopefully we can go to see Pirates at the drive-in next weekend, along with the masses. I imagine it will be crowded as hell.
Based on the weather, the Scottish highland festival is going to feel quite... Scottish. It's supposed to be pretty cool and rainy through early afternoon tomorrow.
Then there's a new Doctor Who episode on BBC One tomorrow night, which I'll probably watch several times before I finally go to sleep.
I have a fanfic to draft up for a ficathon I joined a couple weeks ago. Deadline for the story is July 1st. I have my three prompts to write from. One has me a bit stumped (mostly because I don't want to fall into cliches with Doctor Who fandom that surround the episode particularly mentioned), but as long as I write to fulfill at least one prompt, I'm in good shape. And I'm completely confident with two of them - so I'll start there. Minimum word count is 1,000 words. Not. A. Problem. I may have half of that longhand already, and I'm still in the first scene.
In any case, my goal is to get the draft written by the end of Memorial Day weekend so I can shunt it off to my betas (aka fanfic editors), giving me plenty of time to fine tune it with my betas before the deadline.
Other than that, I have some organizing to do this weekend, some little wedding contact stuff to finish, some big wedding research stuff to do, and a lot of stitching.
All in all, a big weekend. :)
Hopefully we can go to see Pirates at the drive-in next weekend, along with the masses. I imagine it will be crowded as hell.
Based on the weather, the Scottish highland festival is going to feel quite... Scottish. It's supposed to be pretty cool and rainy through early afternoon tomorrow.
Then there's a new Doctor Who episode on BBC One tomorrow night, which I'll probably watch several times before I finally go to sleep.
I have a fanfic to draft up for a ficathon I joined a couple weeks ago. Deadline for the story is July 1st. I have my three prompts to write from. One has me a bit stumped (mostly because I don't want to fall into cliches with Doctor Who fandom that surround the episode particularly mentioned), but as long as I write to fulfill at least one prompt, I'm in good shape. And I'm completely confident with two of them - so I'll start there. Minimum word count is 1,000 words. Not. A. Problem. I may have half of that longhand already, and I'm still in the first scene.
In any case, my goal is to get the draft written by the end of Memorial Day weekend so I can shunt it off to my betas (aka fanfic editors), giving me plenty of time to fine tune it with my betas before the deadline.
Other than that, I have some organizing to do this weekend, some little wedding contact stuff to finish, some big wedding research stuff to do, and a lot of stitching.
All in all, a big weekend. :)
15 May 2007
*blinks* So where am I again?
It's been a down-then-up day with wedding stuff.
Down as I panicked with an email from my mother - who informed me that the hotel she wanted to stay at is all booked up (with no rooms currently reserved under her name), and she was confused as to whether she should have been responsible for blocking rooms.
That lead to me writing a very quick and probably inappropriately terse email to my mom, copying Erich on the mess, with my priorities and when I'm planning to do things - along with a note that says "if it's not on my immediate priority list and you want to take it to run with it... go for it. Just tell me you're running with it.")
I'll apologize to my mom tomorrow for coming across too brashly. And not by email - by phone. - with some extra help by buttering her up with flowers for her birthday tomorrow. I can be a shitty daughter at times, and this wedding is undoubtedly bringing out some of my nastiness that I keep in check about 95% of the time.
I've gone off my rant and feel much better after the better part of my wedding day, which was getting the yay!yes! call from my uber-lovely Maid of Honor, who, along with the other two women I hope to have standing by my side (the other two haven't replied yet... as I dropped them a line a bit later), tend to help keep me sane.
The next two big things on the list with the planning are finding a photographer, and getting Erich's kilt order settled. The photographer is something that I'm definitely feeling the pressure to book very, very soon. I've asked Erich to do some thinking about the type of photography he wants for our wedding and the types of keepsakes he wants to have so we can search for a photographer who will provide us with the service we're looking for.
Once the photographer is booked, the only vendors I'll have left to settle are flowers, transportation, and the cake. All of which I'm not quite so concerned about (but want to get settled fairly quickly as well).
The kilt is mostly in Erich's hands, of course, but I want to help him out with figuring out what to get. His mom had wanted him to wear a kilt since he does have a decent Scots heritage - and knows the clan (MacIntosh). And I want him to wear a kilt because I think he looks quite sexy in one. It's also an emotional tie-in with my family. I know from the scant details about my biological parents that my mother was Norwegian, but my father was Scots-Irish. And my adoptive family has some very close ties to Scotland - and to a particular family that became essentially adopted extended family while my grandfather was a radio operator in the U.K. during World War II.
So regardless of the fact that my last name is switching from something Celtic-turned-English to very distinctly German... I'm all up for celebrating the Scottish part of the blended family heritage at this fest. We need something to tone down the Polish. *grin*
So this Saturday we're heading to the Rhode Island Scottish Festival, partially because I do really just want to go to one... but also to get some ideas for his kilt. Should he go all-out formal? Or should we make it a bit more casual? And he needs to get properly fitted, too. Which I suppose I could measure him, but I'd rather find someone who actually knows what they're doing.
Making progress. Continuing to go insane, and having moments of "can I just elope?!?" panic. But I'm getting there.
Items I've recently completed:
- Reserving our officiant. We actually can get married because someone's willing to do the deed. It's one of our friends. My mom semi-jokingly asked if we could "put him in a collar." And while The Reverend Landry has a nice ring to it, um... no.
- Booking a new DJ. My friend T was a lifesaver and gave me the contact for hers from last year. So it's a DJ I've already essentially had a full wedding tryout with, really liked his music and MC skills - and I feel good using him.
- Contacted my maid of honor and bridesmaids to ask them if they'd to me the honor. Melinda's said yes. I'm crossing my fingers on the other two I've asked, and then need to drop a line to my cousins - who already know anyway that they're in the wedding, but I do want to make it official and all.
Ever moving forward...
- Mel.
Down as I panicked with an email from my mother - who informed me that the hotel she wanted to stay at is all booked up (with no rooms currently reserved under her name), and she was confused as to whether she should have been responsible for blocking rooms.
That lead to me writing a very quick and probably inappropriately terse email to my mom, copying Erich on the mess, with my priorities and when I'm planning to do things - along with a note that says "if it's not on my immediate priority list and you want to take it to run with it... go for it. Just tell me you're running with it.")
I'll apologize to my mom tomorrow for coming across too brashly. And not by email - by phone. - with some extra help by buttering her up with flowers for her birthday tomorrow. I can be a shitty daughter at times, and this wedding is undoubtedly bringing out some of my nastiness that I keep in check about 95% of the time.
I've gone off my rant and feel much better after the better part of my wedding day, which was getting the yay!yes! call from my uber-lovely Maid of Honor, who, along with the other two women I hope to have standing by my side (the other two haven't replied yet... as I dropped them a line a bit later), tend to help keep me sane.
The next two big things on the list with the planning are finding a photographer, and getting Erich's kilt order settled. The photographer is something that I'm definitely feeling the pressure to book very, very soon. I've asked Erich to do some thinking about the type of photography he wants for our wedding and the types of keepsakes he wants to have so we can search for a photographer who will provide us with the service we're looking for.
Once the photographer is booked, the only vendors I'll have left to settle are flowers, transportation, and the cake. All of which I'm not quite so concerned about (but want to get settled fairly quickly as well).
The kilt is mostly in Erich's hands, of course, but I want to help him out with figuring out what to get. His mom had wanted him to wear a kilt since he does have a decent Scots heritage - and knows the clan (MacIntosh). And I want him to wear a kilt because I think he looks quite sexy in one. It's also an emotional tie-in with my family. I know from the scant details about my biological parents that my mother was Norwegian, but my father was Scots-Irish. And my adoptive family has some very close ties to Scotland - and to a particular family that became essentially adopted extended family while my grandfather was a radio operator in the U.K. during World War II.
So regardless of the fact that my last name is switching from something Celtic-turned-English to very distinctly German... I'm all up for celebrating the Scottish part of the blended family heritage at this fest. We need something to tone down the Polish. *grin*
So this Saturday we're heading to the Rhode Island Scottish Festival, partially because I do really just want to go to one... but also to get some ideas for his kilt. Should he go all-out formal? Or should we make it a bit more casual? And he needs to get properly fitted, too. Which I suppose I could measure him, but I'd rather find someone who actually knows what they're doing.
Making progress. Continuing to go insane, and having moments of "can I just elope?!?" panic. But I'm getting there.
Items I've recently completed:
- Reserving our officiant. We actually can get married because someone's willing to do the deed. It's one of our friends. My mom semi-jokingly asked if we could "put him in a collar." And while The Reverend Landry has a nice ring to it, um... no.
- Booking a new DJ. My friend T was a lifesaver and gave me the contact for hers from last year. So it's a DJ I've already essentially had a full wedding tryout with, really liked his music and MC skills - and I feel good using him.
- Contacted my maid of honor and bridesmaids to ask them if they'd to me the honor. Melinda's said yes. I'm crossing my fingers on the other two I've asked, and then need to drop a line to my cousins - who already know anyway that they're in the wedding, but I do want to make it official and all.
Ever moving forward...
- Mel.
12 May 2007
The motherless Mother's Day
A few weeks ago, our friend John R. dropped me a note to ask me what I thought about having a LAN party this weekend. Last year Erich and I hosted a Memorial Day one (to counter the annual Thanksgiving LAN out on the Cape), but John will be in China this year for Memorial Day, and wanted to have one before he left.
So he offered to host. He then asked me how I thought Erich would feel about having it Mother's Day weekend, given his mom's recent death. I told him that I honestly didn't know, but I'd imagine he'd far prefer being with friends than he would be spending it alone.
And so the plans developed. We'll be heading to John's this afternoon for a shortened overnight LAN, partially to just be with friends and goof off, and partially to be there for Erich on the first real reminder of events. From what I've heard, it's going to be a smaller but comfy group of around 6 or so.
So he offered to host. He then asked me how I thought Erich would feel about having it Mother's Day weekend, given his mom's recent death. I told him that I honestly didn't know, but I'd imagine he'd far prefer being with friends than he would be spending it alone.
And so the plans developed. We'll be heading to John's this afternoon for a shortened overnight LAN, partially to just be with friends and goof off, and partially to be there for Erich on the first real reminder of events. From what I've heard, it's going to be a smaller but comfy group of around 6 or so.
Writing exercises - When readers read my novels...
As part of my "Mel needs to work on improving her writing, particularly with her story structure" edumacation... I've taken a blank notebook and am working through the exercises in the book.
I now have an hour plus commute each way on the train by myself, so it gives me plenty of time to do some personal study work - especially if I've been successful in claiming one of the coveted single seat rows on the train. (I do every morning from Providence, but it's not always possible on the way home due to the masses at South Station).
Anyway... for my own records, I'll be typing some of my quick-response essays in the exercises here. It'll be something hopefully a bit more interesting than the oodles of memes that have taken over lately. I'll be typing these exactly as written, with all spelling and grammar mistakes.
I've started with the "Plot and Structure" book mentioned a couple entries ago. It's been extremely interesting so far. Lots of ideas to chew on, but it's written in a laid-back, accessible style that's not intimidating at all.
Exercise 1, page 20 - write a mini-essay that fits the following. Write rough for 10 minutes.
When readers read my novels, I want them to feel ___________ at the end. That's because, to me, novels are __________."
I now have an hour plus commute each way on the train by myself, so it gives me plenty of time to do some personal study work - especially if I've been successful in claiming one of the coveted single seat rows on the train. (I do every morning from Providence, but it's not always possible on the way home due to the masses at South Station).
Anyway... for my own records, I'll be typing some of my quick-response essays in the exercises here. It'll be something hopefully a bit more interesting than the oodles of memes that have taken over lately. I'll be typing these exactly as written, with all spelling and grammar mistakes.
I've started with the "Plot and Structure" book mentioned a couple entries ago. It's been extremely interesting so far. Lots of ideas to chew on, but it's written in a laid-back, accessible style that's not intimidating at all.
Exercise 1, page 20 - write a mini-essay that fits the following. Write rough for 10 minutes.
When readers read my novels, I want them to feel ___________ at the end. That's because, to me, novels are __________."
- When readers read my novels, I want them to feel transported at the end. That's because, to me, novels are an escape from the mundane. I read to escape and unwind, whether on the train - as I am now - or in bed. Reading allows me to let go of the everyday stress I carry with me, helping me to clear my mind and refocus myself.
A good novel, well - any enjoyable novel, anyway - is one with quirky, deeply-realized characters in well-realized worlds. I love to be able to close my eyes and see the view around me. I want to share in my character's joys and sorrows. I want to cling nervously to a ledge that may break at any moment, and feel the grit of loose rock beneath my fingers.
A good novel also makes me think. I far prefer happy endings - but I'd rather have a sad or ambigous ending - sucha s the end of the TV one-off "Recovery," than have a picture-perfect, everything neat and tidy ending. The ending needs to fit. And I want to care about the ending. At the end of Recovery, Alan's future is left unclear. A few days after watching, I wondered about how the character might be doing. Is his life improving? Has he had another setback? Does his story have a happy ending, or merely fall into statistics?
A novel makes me want to care. And, caring about a novel means I'm enjoying my spare time.
- Time ends -
09 May 2007
A trip to the bra store
When did it get to Wednesday? This week is absolutely flying!
As always, I didn't get stuff done that I wanted to complete. BUT... I did make progress, so I'm forgiving myself. Kinda. Maybe.
Friday afternoon I stuck to my plan - I bought the undergarments for the wedding dress. I went to a traditional lingerie shop called Ruth's, located in Rolfe Square in Cranston. Walking down there is like transporting yourself to the sixties - small, locally owned shops. There's the hardware store, the pizza place, the coffee shop, the shoe store, the lingerie store, a former movie theatre now getting some massive reconstruction ... everything side by side on a tree-lined street for convenient pre-strip mall era shopping.
I think I was the youngest person in the lingerie store by about 20 years, although most of the bra styles in there were very cute and modern - lots of spring and summer patterns for the teen set and up. As always, not in my rather... endowed... size (*cough* 44triple, thankye), but I still could admire, and dream, and yet again feel fat.
Anyway, the shop workers were quite kind and helpful. In less than an hour, I was measured, fitted, and set to go with a little pink bag of underwear, and my huge wedding dress garment bag flung over my shoulder.
And as recommended by many people (both recent brides and bridal shop workers), they're functional but oh-so-not-sexy. Unless you're into girdle-style undershorts with weird stitching swirlies on the stomach and butt to help shape things. Ugly. as. sin. I'd never worn a girdle before. And it has those clipy things on the bottom for thigh-high stockings. Absolutely fascinating. Very weird.
But I have to admit, once I tried my dress on over them (squee! for the very first time), it's amazing the difference they make in shape.
And I may have just found a place to go get bras from now on. I may have trouble finding 44DDD's in the normal stores - including Lane Bryant and the Avenue, I might add (since all of their new trendy bras stop at a DD... bastards).
But here I've found a store that had... in stock... a 50H.
Somehow, I don't think I'll have a problem.
As always, I didn't get stuff done that I wanted to complete. BUT... I did make progress, so I'm forgiving myself. Kinda. Maybe.
Friday afternoon I stuck to my plan - I bought the undergarments for the wedding dress. I went to a traditional lingerie shop called Ruth's, located in Rolfe Square in Cranston. Walking down there is like transporting yourself to the sixties - small, locally owned shops. There's the hardware store, the pizza place, the coffee shop, the shoe store, the lingerie store, a former movie theatre now getting some massive reconstruction ... everything side by side on a tree-lined street for convenient pre-strip mall era shopping.
I think I was the youngest person in the lingerie store by about 20 years, although most of the bra styles in there were very cute and modern - lots of spring and summer patterns for the teen set and up. As always, not in my rather... endowed... size (*cough* 44triple, thankye), but I still could admire, and dream, and yet again feel fat.
Anyway, the shop workers were quite kind and helpful. In less than an hour, I was measured, fitted, and set to go with a little pink bag of underwear, and my huge wedding dress garment bag flung over my shoulder.
And as recommended by many people (both recent brides and bridal shop workers), they're functional but oh-so-not-sexy. Unless you're into girdle-style undershorts with weird stitching swirlies on the stomach and butt to help shape things. Ugly. as. sin. I'd never worn a girdle before. And it has those clipy things on the bottom for thigh-high stockings. Absolutely fascinating. Very weird.
But I have to admit, once I tried my dress on over them (squee! for the very first time), it's amazing the difference they make in shape.
And I may have just found a place to go get bras from now on. I may have trouble finding 44DDD's in the normal stores - including Lane Bryant and the Avenue, I might add (since all of their new trendy bras stop at a DD... bastards).
But here I've found a store that had... in stock... a 50H.
Somehow, I don't think I'll have a problem.
04 May 2007
Attempting to kick my inner writer in the ass
I've determined that I have three major problems with my writing. And this goes for both fanfiction and my everyday fiction writing. I found this problem during my NaNoWriMo attempts. It annoyed the shit out of me:
1) Fear to actually put words on a page because I can't get my brain to wrap around the concept of a first-draft. My inner editor wants to correct everything in my head before I put a word to the page... so well, nothing gets written. ETA - Nothing, I should say, means that I've actually put about 20,000 words to paper, which is a hell of a lot more than most people can or will write. But I don't feel happy about probably half to over half, and I feel that I'm second- and third-guessing my ideas so much that I'm losing all of them before I get them into written text.
2) I'm getting seriously stuck in writer's block, due to not figuring out how to push my story forward.
3) Somewhere along the line, I've either forgotten how (or never quite mastered) the idea of plot and scene structure. I don't doubt it's causing the most of the writer's block problems.
So, in an attempt to work through these issues, I've done the following:
1) Searched for, and found, two lovely beta-readers for my fic writing. Both of whom I've loved reading, and am thrilled they're willing to work with me.
2) Bought three books at Barnes & Noble to help me do some inner-searching to work through my hangups:
- "Unstuck - A supportive and Practical Guide to Working Through Writer's Block" by Jane Anne Staw, PhD
- "Plot & Structure - Techniques and exercises for crafting a plot that grips readers from start to finish" by James Scott Bell
- "Scene & Structure" by Jack M. Bickham
Hopefully these will help a bit. Regardless of what I'm writing, I definitely want to have my writing improved. Right now, that means putting some damn words to a page.
1) Fear to actually put words on a page because I can't get my brain to wrap around the concept of a first-draft. My inner editor wants to correct everything in my head before I put a word to the page... so well, nothing gets written. ETA - Nothing, I should say, means that I've actually put about 20,000 words to paper, which is a hell of a lot more than most people can or will write. But I don't feel happy about probably half to over half, and I feel that I'm second- and third-guessing my ideas so much that I'm losing all of them before I get them into written text.
2) I'm getting seriously stuck in writer's block, due to not figuring out how to push my story forward.
3) Somewhere along the line, I've either forgotten how (or never quite mastered) the idea of plot and scene structure. I don't doubt it's causing the most of the writer's block problems.
So, in an attempt to work through these issues, I've done the following:
1) Searched for, and found, two lovely beta-readers for my fic writing. Both of whom I've loved reading, and am thrilled they're willing to work with me.
2) Bought three books at Barnes & Noble to help me do some inner-searching to work through my hangups:
- "Unstuck - A supportive and Practical Guide to Working Through Writer's Block" by Jane Anne Staw, PhD
- "Plot & Structure - Techniques and exercises for crafting a plot that grips readers from start to finish" by James Scott Bell
- "Scene & Structure" by Jack M. Bickham
Hopefully these will help a bit. Regardless of what I'm writing, I definitely want to have my writing improved. Right now, that means putting some damn words to a page.
Wedding updates and Weekend Wackiness
First off, a very happy birthday to Melinda and Ian. Hope the celebrations are fun. :)
Second, best of luck to my friends Toni and Maria, who are both walking in Sunday's Walk for Hunger. :) You go, girls!
As for me, it'll be a fairly busy weekend. I have some wedding stuff to get caught up on, some stitching stuff that needs to be completed and mailed, and an office that desperately needs to be put together so I can actually work in there.
This is what my weekend's shaping up to be:
Today: Working a half day, leaving just after one. I'm going for the wedding dress bra fitting this afternoon (whee), followed by new work clothes shopping for Erich (who can now dress in jeans, but somehow doesn't own any), stitching shopping for me, and dinner somewhere we can find room.
Tomorrow: To my knowledge, is "Cinco de Mayo y Who," which translates to craftiness, beer and other drinky things, and a massive Doctor Who catchup session for at least one of my sorority sisters.
Sunday: Attacking the Son of Beast, which is my office. Earlier this year, Erich put a fabulous new desk together for me. Now I just need to organize the rest of the furniture in the room, put stuff on shelves, and make it a workable space. If I have time leftover, I'll get outside and get my planters ready for new plants in a couple weeks. (I doubt I'll have time leftover, though).
The wedding planning continues to be a lesson in thumping my head against doorframes. The DJ that we had reserved backed out on is, pulling a ratty move by calling us not on our cell or office phones - or even emailing us, but on our house phone, telling us that he needed to hear from us "by the end of business today" or he'd be taking the alternate client. And of course, we don't get home from work until after 7 - which I'd told him when giving him contact numbers. Asshole. Thankfully, we have our deposit back and the original copy of the contract (which I've ripped up). So we're back to square 1 on the DJ. And I'm very annoyed about the whole thing.
But on the good news front, we now can officially get married. Erich asked one of our friends, Tony, if he would mind being our officiant. Tony was flattered and thrilled - so "Reverend Landry" will be presiding over our ceremony. :)
Flowers, cake, what to do about bridesmaids... all on my plate for the next week and a half. Whee.
I've heard rumors of a mid-70's weather week all week next week.
I'll believe it when I see it. :)
Happy Friday!
Second, best of luck to my friends Toni and Maria, who are both walking in Sunday's Walk for Hunger. :) You go, girls!
As for me, it'll be a fairly busy weekend. I have some wedding stuff to get caught up on, some stitching stuff that needs to be completed and mailed, and an office that desperately needs to be put together so I can actually work in there.
This is what my weekend's shaping up to be:
Today: Working a half day, leaving just after one. I'm going for the wedding dress bra fitting this afternoon (whee), followed by new work clothes shopping for Erich (who can now dress in jeans, but somehow doesn't own any), stitching shopping for me, and dinner somewhere we can find room.
Tomorrow: To my knowledge, is "Cinco de Mayo y Who," which translates to craftiness, beer and other drinky things, and a massive Doctor Who catchup session for at least one of my sorority sisters.
Sunday: Attacking the Son of Beast, which is my office. Earlier this year, Erich put a fabulous new desk together for me. Now I just need to organize the rest of the furniture in the room, put stuff on shelves, and make it a workable space. If I have time leftover, I'll get outside and get my planters ready for new plants in a couple weeks. (I doubt I'll have time leftover, though).
The wedding planning continues to be a lesson in thumping my head against doorframes. The DJ that we had reserved backed out on is, pulling a ratty move by calling us not on our cell or office phones - or even emailing us, but on our house phone, telling us that he needed to hear from us "by the end of business today" or he'd be taking the alternate client. And of course, we don't get home from work until after 7 - which I'd told him when giving him contact numbers. Asshole. Thankfully, we have our deposit back and the original copy of the contract (which I've ripped up). So we're back to square 1 on the DJ. And I'm very annoyed about the whole thing.
But on the good news front, we now can officially get married. Erich asked one of our friends, Tony, if he would mind being our officiant. Tony was flattered and thrilled - so "Reverend Landry" will be presiding over our ceremony. :)
Flowers, cake, what to do about bridesmaids... all on my plate for the next week and a half. Whee.
I've heard rumors of a mid-70's weather week all week next week.
I'll believe it when I see it. :)
Happy Friday!
03 May 2007
Thursday Thirteen #24 - Yard Stuff
This year, Erich and I have been focusing a bit on the condition of our property. The former owners, due to age and other priorities, didn't do a lot with the yard. Bushes are overgrown, trees need to be hacked back a bit, the grass needs some TLC.
For this Thursday Thirteen, here are plants that I hope to eventually have in our yard, to make things all pretty:
1) Two Japanese Maples - one red leaf, one green leaf, preferably with different textured leaves. They're so delicate and add such a lovely texture to yards, and I love looking up through the leaves of Japanese Maples toward the sky.
2) Magnolia/Tulip Tree - I've heard these called by either name. I'm not sure which is technically correct. But they are absolutely gorgeous when they bloom - almost unreal. Here's a fantastic example: here. I was first introduced to these when I moved to Boston - they line Commonwealth Avenue, and are my favorite part of spring.
3) Wisteria - we have a couple of spots where we could put a lattice arch, and I'd love to train wisteria to coil up and around it. It's such a lovely old-style plant, and when it blooms the scent is fantastic. Dream example link: here.
4) Bleeding Hearts - I grew up with a couple of these beauties in our back yard. One was pure white, the other pink and white. I'd prefer the latter. But I have a great front bed that needs some medium sized, low-maintenance plants. Example: here
5) Oakleaf Hydrangea - I already have two Nikko Blue hydrangeas in my yard (which bloom a lilac color due to my soil acidity). But depending on what we do about the ugly maples along the side of our property that need to be removed... we'll either replace with some trees, or I'd like to plant some of these. They get huge, would provide some great privacy, and look striking even after the flowers fade. I don't think these come in anything but white. Or at least, I've never seen anything but white: Example: here.
6) Flowering Cherry Tree - Another tree I was introduced to when I moved to New England. I particularly like the "Kwanza" style, which has huge mops of flowers hanging below the tree branch. When they're in full bloom, the tree just looks like it's overloaded with flowers. Example: here
7) Azaleas - I lean toward the pink, since it seems most people in my area have the purple ones. But I think an azalea bush would be a nice addition to the front bed that needs planting, too. It would look great against the white clapboards.
8) Daylilies - that aren't the wild tiger-striped ones I currently have taking over my yard. And I'd like some that actually... flower... from time to time. I know there are tons of styles. I'd pick colors and such depending on what else I have flowering over the summer.
9) Traditional spring early bulbs - crocus, daffodils, tulips... I don't have any in my yard. Something to signify the beginning of spring may need to go into the yard. I may even naturalize them into the lawn itself. I've seen a lot of people do that, and it looks great. By the time the lawn needs to be mowed, those flowers (well... maybe not the tulips) are basically done flowering. So you just mow the leftovers, and they come back the next year.
10) Ferns - Again, this depends on what we do with the trees that need to be removed. But if we plant new trees, I'll add ferns under them for groundcover (and to help keep the soil even more damp). We have a small hill by the treeline that the grass doesn't grow on. Ferns will cover up the weird tree root paths and just soften it.
11) Impatiens (yearly) - Lots of little shady nooks in our yard. Impatiens would just look fantastic making the shadows pop with color
12) Raspberries - Erich and I both grew up with raspberry bushes in our backyards. There's nothing quite like just roaming into the yard, plucking berries off of sun-warmed vines, and popping them. And yes, I know you need to watch raspberry bushes like a hawk because they spread like crazy. But I know the perfect spot for them. :)
13) Blueberries - I'd argue that this is probably Erich's favorite food, aside from Swedish meatballs. They never seem to last when you buy them at the store. Having them available for raspberry-like popping would be a great alternative for me. :)
Now of course, this isn't everything that I'd love to have in my yard. Two of my favorites, lilacs and forsythia, aren't included because I already have strong plants in my yard that bloom wonderfully (and are already large and well-established).
For this Thursday Thirteen, here are plants that I hope to eventually have in our yard, to make things all pretty:
1) Two Japanese Maples - one red leaf, one green leaf, preferably with different textured leaves. They're so delicate and add such a lovely texture to yards, and I love looking up through the leaves of Japanese Maples toward the sky.
2) Magnolia/Tulip Tree - I've heard these called by either name. I'm not sure which is technically correct. But they are absolutely gorgeous when they bloom - almost unreal. Here's a fantastic example: here. I was first introduced to these when I moved to Boston - they line Commonwealth Avenue, and are my favorite part of spring.
3) Wisteria - we have a couple of spots where we could put a lattice arch, and I'd love to train wisteria to coil up and around it. It's such a lovely old-style plant, and when it blooms the scent is fantastic. Dream example link: here.
4) Bleeding Hearts - I grew up with a couple of these beauties in our back yard. One was pure white, the other pink and white. I'd prefer the latter. But I have a great front bed that needs some medium sized, low-maintenance plants. Example: here
5) Oakleaf Hydrangea - I already have two Nikko Blue hydrangeas in my yard (which bloom a lilac color due to my soil acidity). But depending on what we do about the ugly maples along the side of our property that need to be removed... we'll either replace with some trees, or I'd like to plant some of these. They get huge, would provide some great privacy, and look striking even after the flowers fade. I don't think these come in anything but white. Or at least, I've never seen anything but white: Example: here.
6) Flowering Cherry Tree - Another tree I was introduced to when I moved to New England. I particularly like the "Kwanza" style, which has huge mops of flowers hanging below the tree branch. When they're in full bloom, the tree just looks like it's overloaded with flowers. Example: here
7) Azaleas - I lean toward the pink, since it seems most people in my area have the purple ones. But I think an azalea bush would be a nice addition to the front bed that needs planting, too. It would look great against the white clapboards.
8) Daylilies - that aren't the wild tiger-striped ones I currently have taking over my yard. And I'd like some that actually... flower... from time to time. I know there are tons of styles. I'd pick colors and such depending on what else I have flowering over the summer.
9) Traditional spring early bulbs - crocus, daffodils, tulips... I don't have any in my yard. Something to signify the beginning of spring may need to go into the yard. I may even naturalize them into the lawn itself. I've seen a lot of people do that, and it looks great. By the time the lawn needs to be mowed, those flowers (well... maybe not the tulips) are basically done flowering. So you just mow the leftovers, and they come back the next year.
10) Ferns - Again, this depends on what we do with the trees that need to be removed. But if we plant new trees, I'll add ferns under them for groundcover (and to help keep the soil even more damp). We have a small hill by the treeline that the grass doesn't grow on. Ferns will cover up the weird tree root paths and just soften it.
11) Impatiens (yearly) - Lots of little shady nooks in our yard. Impatiens would just look fantastic making the shadows pop with color
12) Raspberries - Erich and I both grew up with raspberry bushes in our backyards. There's nothing quite like just roaming into the yard, plucking berries off of sun-warmed vines, and popping them. And yes, I know you need to watch raspberry bushes like a hawk because they spread like crazy. But I know the perfect spot for them. :)
13) Blueberries - I'd argue that this is probably Erich's favorite food, aside from Swedish meatballs. They never seem to last when you buy them at the store. Having them available for raspberry-like popping would be a great alternative for me. :)
Now of course, this isn't everything that I'd love to have in my yard. Two of my favorites, lilacs and forsythia, aren't included because I already have strong plants in my yard that bloom wonderfully (and are already large and well-established).
01 May 2007
Blessed Beltane
Good morning Boston! You see that beautiful big bright ball in the sky? That's the SUN. That thing that we haven't seen a whole hell of a lot of in recent weeks.
And guess what else? It brought that other foreign thing - WARMTH.
So play hooky so I can live vicariously through you, please.
thank you.
/public service announcement
-----------------------
One thing that I really need to learn to stop doing (although it is oh, so much fun) is not to have Beltane-related celebrations at one in the morning. *cough*
But like I said - it is quite fun. ;)
I had to do a reluctant trip to $tarbucks this morning for a venti chai latte to help me wake up today. I didn't put enough nutmeg in it, but it'll do. Whether or not I stay awake today, though, is a mystery.
It's been a weird couple weeks in the Geekywitch household. Erich interviewed for a new job two weeks ago, and found out last week that he'd gotten it. He gave a week's notice (due to being so miserable), and now is enjoying a week to catch up on stuff at home. He's taken the very daring route of vowing to clean up/out our entire house this week. And to my surprise, he's actually doing a pretty damn good job of it so far. He's got a list of all of those annoying little projects we really, truly need to get done. He's just working through them.
And the new job starts on Monday. I really hope he'll be happy there.
The only downside of this change is that I'm commuting from Providence to Boston on my own from now on. Erich will be driving to his new job (still in Massachusetts, but not all the way up to the city). Some mornings I'm sure I'll commute part way with him, be dropped off at a random MBTA station, etc. But it's a little weird being on my own again, curled up on a T car, letting my mind wander aimlessly as the scenery flies by. I'm hoping that once my brain adjusts to the new "routine" that I'll be able to make my nearly 3 hours of commute time per day worthwhile with some writing, some stitching, etc.
Life certainly doesn't slow down, does it?
And guess what else? It brought that other foreign thing - WARMTH.
So play hooky so I can live vicariously through you, please.
thank you.
/public service announcement
-----------------------
One thing that I really need to learn to stop doing (although it is oh, so much fun) is not to have Beltane-related celebrations at one in the morning. *cough*
But like I said - it is quite fun. ;)
I had to do a reluctant trip to $tarbucks this morning for a venti chai latte to help me wake up today. I didn't put enough nutmeg in it, but it'll do. Whether or not I stay awake today, though, is a mystery.
It's been a weird couple weeks in the Geekywitch household. Erich interviewed for a new job two weeks ago, and found out last week that he'd gotten it. He gave a week's notice (due to being so miserable), and now is enjoying a week to catch up on stuff at home. He's taken the very daring route of vowing to clean up/out our entire house this week. And to my surprise, he's actually doing a pretty damn good job of it so far. He's got a list of all of those annoying little projects we really, truly need to get done. He's just working through them.
And the new job starts on Monday. I really hope he'll be happy there.
The only downside of this change is that I'm commuting from Providence to Boston on my own from now on. Erich will be driving to his new job (still in Massachusetts, but not all the way up to the city). Some mornings I'm sure I'll commute part way with him, be dropped off at a random MBTA station, etc. But it's a little weird being on my own again, curled up on a T car, letting my mind wander aimlessly as the scenery flies by. I'm hoping that once my brain adjusts to the new "routine" that I'll be able to make my nearly 3 hours of commute time per day worthwhile with some writing, some stitching, etc.
Life certainly doesn't slow down, does it?
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