I'm here... I'm alive

I'm recovering from a cold which hammered me this weekend, but alive. I'm still over-stressed and running in circles, but the house is slowly getting back to a state where we don't have to potentially classify it in the first stages of squalor. (it probably wasn't quite that bad... but it was getting rather *ew*).

I'm running in a semi-mopey state these days. A good portion of it is due to being on cold meds... I'm okay, really. Just overwhelmed and overdrugged. So please don't read into this any over-depressed tones. My meds really are just keeping me at about the lowest running state I could be at and still function.

Superbowl-- meh. Watched the first half. Was bored. Commercials didn't impress me, either. We switched to the Kitty Halftime show on Animal Planet, and that basically broke my interest for the game. I wandered upstairs after watching kittens go apeshit on a big cat tower and went back to playing World of Warcrack.

I still need to call Andi, who left a message two weeks ago announcing the birth of her second baby. :) Since Andi and I are sisters via adopting each other, I'm an auntie of two now. :) Of course, I'm the shitty sister/auntie who hasn't called, but illness was the excuse... so I'll be trying to catch up later this week once I'm secure in the strength of my voice and a lack of coughing.

Anyway...the big (and really only) news beyond happy events with Andi is more info with the wedding--

The original place we wanted for our reception is a bust at $200 a head plus rental fees for the space and personnel (ah.... no. g-bye.)

So, being clueless... again.... we went to a bridal expo over the last weekend of January in Cranston. There were tons of vendors there, and we picked up lots of information. Some of it was very helpful, but between the poundingly loud msuic and just SO many vendors, both of us went into information overload within a couple hours. We fell in love with a couple of places that presented space for receptions. I'm worried that they'll be too expensive again (if they're featured in Gourmet magazine, my guess is probably... yes. But I'll check it out anyway).

The $15,000 flat fee for a 25 guest wedding planned completely by a wedding planner in the Carribean is entirely too tempting. As is eloping... STILL. But I'm trying my best to work on the wedding here.

And the saying about making a good impression to secure a customer truly does work-- because the biggest thing that sticks out from the day was a negative impression I received. Late in the tour of vendors, Erich was looking at a cigar vendor as I was checking out the tux vendor across the way. The sales rep asked (as so many had that day) if I were the bride. I said yes. He asked who would be responsible for tuxes, and I said my fiancé. And then the guy said "yes, but who will be picking out what he's wearing?" I repeated that Erich would be. And the man gave me a look of shock and then that amused look that said "no really, chick. Don't lie... you'll be picking them out, won't you?"

Immediately my thought was What? It's so wrong to be letting the groom pick out the tux he wants to wear for his wedding? Are men not allowed to dress themselves? I continued to look at him with all of the honesty of the answer I'd given him, my expression turning slightly annoyed at being asked the same question twice.

The guy definitely noticed my annoyance, changed his line of questioning, and asked when the wedding was. And I stated that we were still open-dated. Hoping for this autumn, but had not yet booked a reception site to secure a date. As soon as I said that, his tone immediately became one of shooing me away because I was not worth his time, insisting that his discounts could really only be used if we had a date and could sign up with him on the spot.

Great way to get customers, buddy.

I of course was as gracious as possible and apologized that no, we didn't have a date. But thanks anyway.

Ass.

Seriously-- is it so far-fetched to accept that yes, I can and do trust the man I'm marrying to be grown-up enough to dress himself? He's thirty-one, not four. It's not like I pick out his clothes for him for work every day. If he asks my opinion in the store on a color or style, I'll give it-- but he's perfectly capable of picking out clothes that he likes and feels comfortable in. I mean... will I be involved with the tuxes? Somewhat-- I can work on coordinating color, if need be. But other than a goofy high-school joke for a Sadie Hawkins formal where my boyfriend and I went in reverse-color tuxes, I don't wear them. I'm not a guy... obviously... and I don't have a clue how they should fit a guy.

Maybe I'm just not type-A enough to understand some unwritten faux pas of wedding planning, but it seemed a given that unless asked by Erich to handle it, he was responsible for picking out his tux because to presume to tell him what to wear without giving him first dibs seems so condescending.

It could just be me, though.

~ Mel.